What the peas are doin

Each month I read online what stage my babies are in to according to their age. I always read about their current age and their adjusted age. What they are doing developmentally is based on their adjusted age until about 1 year. So while they are almost 8 1/2 months they are really 7 months.

Currently the babies have showed signs of stranger anxiety and separation anxiety.

It's natural for your baby to start showing signs of separation anxiety when you leave her in the care of others. In fact, it's a sign of normal, healthy development. Not that knowing this makes it any easier on you to see your baby in distress.

Do all babies experience separation anxiety?

Yes, to a degree. At certain stages, most babies or toddlers will show true anxiety and be upset at the prospect — or reality — of being separated from a parent. If you think about separation anxiety in evolutionary terms, it makes sense: A defenseless baby would naturally get upset at being separated from the person who protects and cares for him.

In many ways, attitudes about babies and separations are cultural. Western countries tend to stress autonomy from a very early age. But in many other cultures, infants are rarely separated from their mother in the first year of life.

Regardless of the origins of this normal developmental stage, it's frustrating for babies and parents. The good news is that separation anxiety will pass and there are ways to make it more manageable. And in the meantime, enjoy the sweetness of knowing that to your child, you're number one.

When does it most commonly occur?

Babies can show signs of separation anxiety as early as 6 or 7 months, but the crisis age for most babies is between 12 to 18 months. Most commonly, separation anxiety strikes when you or your spouse leaves your child to go to work or run an errand. Babies can also experience separation anxiety at night, safely tucked in their cribs with Mom and Dad in the next room.

Stranger Anxiety

Your baby is going through one of her first emotional milestones — stranger anxiety. Children this age become very clingy and anxious around new and even familiar people and may cry if suddenly approached by a stranger. Your child may also be more anxious around new people when she's tired, hungry, or sick. Keep this in mind when you're around people she doesn't know, and try not to be upset or embarrassed when she cries in someone else's arms. To calm her down, take her back and hold her yourself (a big pet peeve is when people do not give me back my crying child).

If you explain that your child is going through a normal phase, your friends will understand. Tell them that when they approach the baby, slow gentle movements will produce less anxiety than sudden ones. If your child refuses to be held by a friend or relative, try a slow desensitization process. First, work on having her be comfortable in your arms while the other person is around. Then, have the person talk and play with your child while you hold her. Then, hand him over to the other person for a short time and stay close. Finally, try to leave the room for a few minutes, and see how it goes. If your child bawls, try again. Go in and out of the room and eventually, your child will be secure in the knowledge that even though you're not around at the moment, you'll always return shortly.

Besides that, Kaleiah has started to crawl slowly but surly! Also, she is getting her two bottom teeth at once! Even through that, she is still a doll. Kaden is perfectly happy just rolling around, crawling has not interested him yet :) They are both perfectly healthy and so happy and I love spending all my time taking care of them!